I got married this weekend (Thanks, thanks. Applause and Congratulations).

It was a GRAND affair. We had a band, and a DJ. There was a huge tent, and a soon-to-be famous recording artist serenaded my bride. Perhaps more about the wedding later, but I haven't decided how much personal information you will see on this page...

At any rate, I got a special request from my paternal grandmother 3 or 4 months before the wedding - "I want you to escort me to my seat." Of course I obliged.

And so, on Saturday April 29th, 2006, at approximately 4:45pm EST, I escorted my Grandma Charlotte down the aisle, to her seat. Let it suffice to say that after that, there was speaking, and singing, and crying, laughing, and much merriment.

My father told me that my grandmother thoroughly enjoyed herself at the wedding. She predicts that very soon, you'll begin to see more and more grandmothers being escorted down the aisle by their grandsons. That brings me to my topic/idea - Start a Trend.

Trends are a funny thing. By their nature, (do trends have nature?), they are temporary, fleeting even. That's how a trend works.

By my count, there are only two types of trends:

• Things to do
• Things to wear

Even though "wearing something" is something one "does", I'm comfortable keeping them separate.

My brother and I discussed starting a trend a few years ago...It was called "Couch Day". Couch Day is a holiday dreamed up for me, by men. It's kinda like Mother's Day, for men. All men. Because Father's Day is a crock. It's the biggest COLLECT calling day of the year, and more ties and aprons with corny quips are sold on that day, than during all the rest of the year. On Couch Day, men everywhere get to lounge on their couch, futon, sofa, what have you, and have women bring them food and drinks, leave the remote control alone, and otherwise stay out of the way until needed. Couch Day is in the most neglected month when it comes to holidays - August. (Conveniently both me and my brother's birthdays are in August.) Just about everyone we've been brave enough to discuss this at length with thinks it's a great idea. The question is...How to start? Do we publicize it on a website? How do we tell people about the site? An e-mail newsletter? A fleet of carrier pigeons?

What should we do? Can you "plan" a trend, or are trends far too spontaneous for that?

By the way, we want Couch Day to be more than a trend eventually.

So, consider this my first attempt at starting a trend, and an ambitious one at that, since I'm trying to start two at one time.

1. Escort your grandmother down the aisle.
2. Convince your S.O. to be a EXTRA loving on August 15.

And don't be surprised if you see a fleet of carrier pigeons with tiny miniature couches strapped to their legs.

Know what I'm Sayin'??

for centuries to come...shout out to Flee.